So…pretty tough day today. Was supposed to play golf with the buddy that I began ‘Chasing 8’ with last year. We used to play together a bunch, but for the last few years, life has gotten in the way, and 9/10 times it’s my life that has gotten in the way.
Today was a total gut punch: My wife works a weird schedule and works basically every Monday, my son is typically in school on Mondays, so I was golden…work til 10:30 then golf with one of my best buds all afternoon. Perfect. Instead…kid wakes up with an upset stomach, not ideal, but wife also got called off work, so I thought I was still in the clear. As I headed to the course, however, the hospital let my wife know they’d need to her to come back in because they just got a bunch of sick babies.
Let me be clear….I had ZERO problem going home and fulfilling my duties. It’s part of being an adult, being a husband, being a father…My family needed me, and I was happy to go. But as I drove home and had to text my buddy yet again to tell him I wouldn’t be coming, I just felt crushed as our plans went up in flames as per usual.
Work, Family, travel, sickness…I’ve had to cancel so much more often than not. The part that really sucks is that I play 10x as much golf as most of my friends bc now I live basically on a golf course and can zip out and play impromptu. But I play by myself A LOT. If I plan golf…if it’s on the calendar and we try to schedule time to play together with friends… it’s almost a given that something disruptive will happen immediately before the round and I will have to bail.
When I canceled today, the guy was like, listen, I was excited you were coming, but I half expected it to fall through. He wasn’t mad, wasn’t being cruel, he was just being honest. But it makes me sad/angry/frustrated. I hate it. And worse, I have no idea what to do about it.
Every single time, the things that pop up happen to someone in my immediate circle, and are beyond my control. Having a kid and a wife with a weird working schedule at the hospital makes things tough at times, but I can’t believe that I’m now the guy that people expect to bail.
Like I said, I don’t even know how to change it, because I’m bailing to take care of responsibilities that I can’t shirk or shy away from. Today it was a sick kid, last time a sick wife, the time before that, I got called into a meeting w our CEO that was non-negotiable. But I swear that stuff is 10x as likely to happen when I have golf plans. I don’t get it. Is this normal??
I don’t mind playing solo or pairing up with random guys to play on the course, and like I’ve said before, 99% of my golf happens during the week when most people are unavailable. I have a fairly flexible schedule and I get that it means I won’t play when my buddies can play a lot of the time. But to have scheduled rounds with them and have to constantly cancel is just awful. You become the guy people stop asking to join them because there’s really no expectation that you’ll really show up. I’m literally known as Mr. Dependable in the other 99.9% of my life, but then this, the thing I’m perhaps most passionate about other than my faith and my family, I’m the “no-show’ guy…
I mused on twitter that as soon as you make golf plans life begins to throw obstacles in your way, and a few chimed in and agreed. I’ve seen posts to that effect on Instagram from golf accounts as well.
What is it with that? Have you experienced something similar?
How do you build golf into your schedule so that it isn’t impact by life events?
Tell me in the comments below or tweet me @GolfGrindBlog. I need your wisdom!